Google wants content for me to activate google adsense on here so how's this for content? I first started using Blogger around 2010-2011. My first blog was crazycustomerservice.blogspot.com while I was working shitty retail jobs. Now in 2020 I'd rather kill myself then go back to retail. An update is also coming soon to crazycustomerservice.blogspot.com about how Walmart both physically and emotionally scarred me for life. I refuse to slave away in some retail job that bullies me, takes advantage of me and doesn't pay fairly for my work (nonsense such as keeping me on the books as part time so I don't get benefits but regularly scheduling me for overtime).
My dream is to be able to make money off web content. I'm a shy computer nerd with severe social anxiety. I just want to be left alone with my cat to make various content. I like making videos https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM11SSdvW3dhTDC0e-lXE9g/featured and photoshop edits https://ko-fi.com/taeyeonuchiha . I kinda suck at them but I love doing it.. I'd like to just focus on teaching myself to do better at all of it...
I made this blog as a place to put my edits and hopefully collect some pennies on ad revenue because honestly I'm fucked... I feel like my life is on a short timer to having to just kill myself... I can't support myself, my family won't support me and the state doesn't give a shit either... Once I run out of my savings the plan for quite a while has been to find somewhere safe for my cat where she'll be loved and taken care of, then come home and probably gas my apartment. Carbon monoxide poisoning doesn't seem so bad...
I'm tired of being a failure, I'm tired of my sister demanding things from me while simultaneously telling me to go fuck myself.. I'm tired of my mother being a brick wall when it comes to me but babying my sister for having a crack addiction... I'm tired of my father slut shaming me for having been sexually assaulted, my family treats me like shit and does not care about my well being... I'm just here basically to take care of my 25 year old crackhead sister while my parents live out of state and do nothing to help. Meanwhile I'm stuck with this asshole coming over here all the time, taking my food (she gets foodstamps but trades it at the bodega for crack money, then takes my food), being demanding, trashing my house, telling me to go fuck myself... "well just don't open the door for her" yeah that would be nice except she used to live here too, never removed her property and still uses it as a loophole to force her way in. "well just move" can't afford to. I already want to kill myself cuz I can't afford shitty low-income housing.
So basically I'm fucked, everyone around me treats me like shit and I can't afford to live. I made this ko-fi account https://ko-fi.com/taeyeonuchiha but haven't gotten a single donation which just shows me even more what a pathetic loser I am... My family doesn't want me, my neighbors and landlord have bullied me and made me feel unwelcome in the community... I can't afford better housing, I can't even afford this shithole... I've been screaming into the void for a while that I need fucking help, that I'm not fucking ok, no one cares or listens... I'm exhausted and hopeless...
I don't even care about leaving this rant online because I pay close attention to my analytics and I know no one's listening. I'm basically talking to myself here. Everyone has left me for dead.
If anyone would like to donate, again the link is https://ko-fi.com/taeyeonuchiha
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